Brewers Pub

Noverber 27, 1992

Dear Jim and Mary:

Sold the car and bought a 4 wheel drive truck. Fell on my ass on the ice in the driveway getting into it. All that was hurt was my feelings.

Still cold (below zero every morning) and the icy roads make for tough driving. I did however make it to the liquor store and bought enough booze to last the winter.

That ass in the snowplow came by while I was gone and covered the driveway again.

Tom

December 5, 1992

Dear Jim and Mary:

Happy “freaking” Holiday from Idaho”. We’re assured a white Christmas this year because 6 more inches of the “white stuff” fell today.

Forget that crap about snow flakes all looking different, you’ve seen one, you’ve seen them all!! Anyway, I took a couple of stiff belts out of the whiskey bottle and suited up to shovel the driveway. You should see it, boots, jump suit, heavy jacket, scarf, ear muffs, gloves, etc. Got in one shovel full and had to pee like a Russian race horse. Figured I’d risk blowing a kidney and finish the job. When I did, I ran for the house and just made it to the toilet. While I was standing relieving myself, I heard a now familiar sound.

Yes, that ass in the snowplow did it again. The only reason I needed to get out was that the liquor cabinet was empty, again! I think the wife has been sipping behind my back!!

Selfish bitch!

T.

As you may know, there are a lot of Californians moving to Idaho these days. Unlike Idaho with its four seasons, California only has two: hot and hot as hell.
The following excerpts are from letters from someone who recently moved to McCall, Idaho.

November 1, 1992

Dear Jim and Mary:

It started to snow this evening about 5:00 p.m. — our first of the season. The wife and I took our cocktails and sat by the window watching the soft flakes drift down. They say that no two snowflakes are the same! It was beautiful.

We woke to a big wonderful blanket of crystal white snow covering our yard and as far as the eye could see. I shoveled snow for the first time in over 30 years — and loved it! Did both the driveway and sidewalk. Of course two minutes after I finished, the snowplow came by and covered it all up again with the compacted snow from the street.

Oh well, ha ha, I took it in stride and shoveled it all again.

Your friend,

Tom

November 10, 1992

Dear Jim and Mary:

Got another 8 inches of snow last night and the temperature dropped to 20 below zero.

Shoveled the driveway so I could get the car out but before I could open the garage door, the snowplow did his thing again. Worked out for the best because the car wouldn’t start anyway.

Fixed myself a drink and laughed it off.

Regards,

Tom

Hey All!

Beginning tomorrow I will be posting a series of letters from a guy who lived in California who moved to Idaho.

These letters will be posted over a period of time… so please come back each day to see the next letters.

Have a great day/night and have a drink for me.

The drunks at Brewer’s Pub

One morning as Paul was getting his newspaper, he noticed on his new house something that needed to be fixed. Heading over to the hardware store, he spoke to the manager, describing his problem. The manager said, “I know just what you need”.

He led Paul down some aisles and stopped in front of some bins. Digging down into some of the bins, he set something up on the shelf. “I saw your house when it was built”, the manager said. “Here’s all that you’ll need and how much it’ll cost…

five will be 15 cents while fifty will be 30 cents, 250 will be 45 cents, while 2507 will only cost you 60 cents.

One lady, about 20 blocks from your house, bought 30247 and only paid 75 cents!

These are black, but they also come in gold and silver.”

What was the manager selling?

Answer will be posted tomorrow.. so stay tune….

If you can drive 90 kms/hr through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard without flinching, you may live in Canada

If you install security lights on your house and garage, but leave both unlocked, you may live in Canada

If you carry jumpers in your car and your wife knows how to use them, you may live in Canada

If you design your kid’s Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit, you may live in Canada

If the speed limit on the highway is 80km — you’re going 90 and everybody is passing you, you may live in Canada

If driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow, you may live in Canada

If you know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter and road construction, you may live in Canada

If you have more miles on your snow blower than your car, you may live in Canada.

If you find 2 degrees “a little chilly”, you may live in Canada

If you actually understand these jokes, and forward them to all your Canadian friends & others, you definitely live in Canada

Contributed by: Mary-Anne

Who says you can’t hid things at work.